The Flaw in Our Ability to Love

Andrew Salomon's opening statement from Chapter 1 of The Noonday Demon, which I quoted in my last post (Crumbs of Love), has been bugging me. . .

Depression is the flaw in love. To be creatures who love, we must be creatures who can despair at what we lose, and depression is the mechanism of that despair

There's something true in what he's saying. . .but there is something untrue as well. It seems to me that perfect (i.e. healthy, or holy) love is able to withstand the grief of lost love without collapsing into depression. Depression, it seems to me, is the flaw in our ability to love.

However, it does bring up a question I wrestle with re: God's character. Has God somehow jeopardized his Divine health (i.e. His holiness) by creating beings with a free will? That is, when some of these creatures reject His care, and instead are ungrateful and become inflamed with their own self-importance which ultimately destroys them. . .how is it that God's heart is not broken? How is it that God doesn't get depressed? I must say it is beyond me. The only way I can understand it is to make God out to be callous. . .which every fiber in my being rejects. I simply don't understand God. . .which leads to a lack of understanding of love. . .which may explain some of my struggles with depression. Actually, it's not a question of understanding. It is a question of being-doing. I can articulate the concept of love in an abstract way. . .but living out a relationship of love with God, with my wife, my children, my family, my priest, my fellow parishioners, my co-workers, etc. . .well, that's what kicks my ass.