Two Horses

Sometimes, when I rush home from work, throw on my Reader's robe and walk into a church service like last night (Great Canon of St. Andrew of Crete) I get the feeling I am standing on two horses like those circus riders do. One horse pounds out this amazing rhythm of spiritual life as passed down by the Church Fathers, while the other one pounds out an equally amazing rhythm of daily life passed down by another set of Fathers (and Mothers). I find it disconcerting because even though the horses beneath me are running side-by-side for the moment, they are horses of a different color and could take off in opposite directions at any moment. Our dear Photini (member of our parish who is dying of liver cancer) has shifted her weight to one of these horses now, and within the next few days she will most likely depart this life. In some ways, I envy her.